We love our kids - but do we like them?

Parent Tips from Mark Gregston » The Wrong Crowd

 

Hi dear friends,

 

I was blessed recently to be on Steve Noble's radio program in Charlotte, North Carolina.  We were  talking about  one of my most requested messages:  10 Mistakes Parents Make with Teens.  Then - just by coincidence (right!!!!!!!!), Mark sent the message above in his weekly newsletter  What an important message for parents of teens.

 

 

 

We have talked often about Josh McDowell's premise that "rules without relationship cause rebellion" - that concept is at the heart of Marks message today on "The Wrong Crowd". 

 

We can not be with our teens every minute of every day (and we don't want to be!).  They need to be making their own decisions and learning that there are joyful consequences of good decisions and painful consequences of poor decisions.  We want to be close enough that we can (hopefully) guide them away from actions that can adversely impact their lives long term but we want to be far enough away that they are free to navigate tough issues and choices.

 

But no matter what, if we do not have a solid relationship with our teen - with a foundation of respect, communication, honesty and LOVE, we don't stand much of a chance.

 

The best way to impact the choices our teens will make is to take a genuine interest in their lives, their world and their decisions.  That comes from spending TIME with our teens - one on one time where we listen, listen and listen some more.  We ask open ended probing questions and then listen.  We ask if they want our thought on an issue or do they just want us to listen.  We (the parents) need to be intentional is seeking time we can spend with our teens - and they might make it difficult from time to time as they test us to see if we are genuine.

 

Our teens need to know that they belong to our family and God's family and they are dearly loved.  They need to know that we acknowledge that the teen years can be very confusing and difficult.  They need to know that we are genuinely interested in what is going on in their lives - not because we are nosey or want to control their lives  - but because we love them and we really care about them - today and tomorrow.  We love them and we like them - even when they act like, you know, TEENAGERS!!!!

 

When we have a solid relationship with our teens, with a foundation of respect, communication, honesty and LOVE, we will have a much easier time coaching our teens through the very exciting and challenging teen years.

 

Love to you all!

 

Scott